- Tim Wheaton
Episode 95 features Icelandic visual artist Rebekka Guðleifsdóttir. Is there such a thing as “admiration at first sight” that is similar in its nature to the whole “love at first sight” thing? I have to assume there is… and that is what my relationship with Rebekka is rooted in. I’m excited that she becomes the first guest of my newest series: “Who Tells Your Story?”
This is the second half of our long conversation. Did you listen to the 1st half? If you didn’t… seriously, you need to go do that now. Even though this is kind of like my The Godfather I and The Godfather II, as good as this 2nd part is, you can’t really take it in perfectly without taking in the 1st half. So, if you haven’t done that, go do that now. Come back. This will still be here.
Okay, now that we’re all on the same page and ready for part 2, let’s move ahead as one.
“I actually spent one night in the hospital on suicide watch…” So, less than one minute into the 2nd half and we are really starting at a high level here because of where part 1 left off. Now you get why I said all of that just before, right? Right.
A very good point to not miss out on here is that this 24-hour “lockdown” was brought about because of Rebekka’s ability to be very honest and humble with a trusted friend about the place her mind was at right then. And that friend was caring and smart about the information given to them. These are key components and I am so relieved and happy and proud of Rebekka for setting that into motion so that (and I don’t say this lightly, as dramatic as it may sound) she is even still alive to have had this conversation with me.
With that said, Rebekka does say this was such a low point for her and that she felt “so pathetic” about it all. Totally understandable or acceptable as a later thought to what took place. But, you know what: I didn’t ask her this, but I’m pretty sure she would say that 100 out of 100 times, she would take those feelings for the benefit of being alive today. I think that’s a pretty fair assumption.
Rebekka retells how she took the painful and necessary steps to finally fully uncover what was really going on with her longtime boyfriend and the relationship he had fully created ‘on the side’. She found what she had been expecting to and describes her sons being so glad to see her “reclaim her self-worth and her self-respect.”
The day she moved out of that relationship was a crazy adventure including a brokedown car being towed by her parents’ car. “I lost my income and I lost my home and I lost my car. But, what I had was my kids and my parents and… obviously friends — ” Sometimes, it’s not easy to see how much we have. It’s easy to say that, of course. But, really. I mean that for myself, as well.
“That was obviously the biggest and most shocking and terrible thing that happened during that time…” This seems like a very apt description of Rebekka telling about how her sons’ biological father took his own life in December of 2020.
Rebekka walks us through how she met her kids’ Dad and the story of their dating relationship. “I will say that I never planned on having kids… at any point. I’d never even thought about it.” The relationship and love that Rebekka and her sons have for each other goes to show how life sometimes has other ideas for us than what we think is right for ourselves.
When he fell in love with someone else and Rebekka had to move back into her parents’ home. “It was just the most dreadfully depressing thing that you can imagine. There was no social media. I had not been in contact with any friends, because I didn’t really have any friends before dating this guy. So I was completely isolated, back at home with my parents, with these two little kids…”
She talks about how things got extremely unpleasant between her and her sons’ Dad (who married the woman he had…
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