Episode 032: Father’s Day 2017

Father’s Day is a good opportunity for a quick little episode. There are a few holidays I will do this with. Something that should please some of you who may get frustrated that my episodes don’t fit into your shorter work commute.

This is my 2nd Annual episode to celebrate Father’s Day. It’s now my 27th Father’s Day without my Dad; the 9th such holiday that I, myself, am being heralded as a Dad. I still do not take that title or job lightly.

For those of you who missed 2016’s Father’s Day episode, let me reset you. My Dad’s last Father’s Day was during my Senior year in High School. The doctors had very recently diagnosed him with brain cancer. I was 17 and that was the last time I would be able to praise him according to the holiday for being the fantastic Father that he had been to me and my 7 siblings.

I still go through a number of emotions when I think back to my 17 year old self, completely unable to process what was going on. It is what it is, but I can’t stop regret from flooding over me when I think about it. Regret for the things I never said, for my fear of being present and dealing with the situation better. Even just to take a handful of minutes to think about what he must have been going through. Aside from the obvious of his steady decline from the cancer, the shame he was feeling of having his teenage son… his youngest… his baby helping to take care of him during that time.

Now as an adult, and a father, I cry just thinking about how I would feel with my kids having to take care of some of the things I was doing for my Dad in those final months and weeks of his life. I know it brought his humility level to a place no adult or parent ever dreams of going. He was a great man, a wonderful Father and at the most basic level of everything: I miss him greatly, whether it is Father’s Day or not.

I took the liberty with this episode to repeat one of the things I did in Episode 008: I played a very small snippet for you all to hear my Dad tell a little bit of a story. It’s a memory that I will never forget. Not only because it involves us going to a baseball game. But because it was one of those weekend days that I spent one on one with my Dad. With 8 kids and a wife, you can guess how divided his free time was.

During this episode, I also thanked each and every one of my guests for their time and wished them all a Happy Father’s Day. Yes, I’m releasing this after Father’s Day this year. But we are all Dads every day of the year, right?

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